Musings Vol. 1

Past these dreams into an endless sorrow
I wake to the new moon in a solitude that I cannot abide by
I see the faceless nameless demon that dwells in my heart
And he laughs at me
I stare into the soulless being that encompasses my truth
In this heart of mine I cry
In this heart of mine I fight
In this heart of mine I struggle to attain the peace my soul longs for
This life of mine that remains with boundaries and chains attached to me
I shout in pain for the struggle that contains me
I cannot see this nameless evil
I cannot fight this devil
Confound within me is the strength to survive
A wish only granted to the forsaken
Dreams and hopes control me
Fate and destiny set me free
This hopeless embrace of a faith that will not let me go
It haunts me in my most treasured of dreams
These scars mark my triumphs
These bruises mark my pain
I see you standing there next to me
You attest to the pain and the sorrow I have lived
It is a mark
A memory
You see this life of mine that I have lived is sorrow
You see this life of mine is truth
You see this life of mine is full of secrecy
In this world I cannot survive
The strength in me cannot remain
These shadows that remain to be unseen
They hide my deepest desires
They hold me to the truth that will set me free
I hide from the sins of the past
I suppress my fears
I strive to walk this earth with a smile you wish I wore all the time
I cannot wear that mask anymore
I cannot hold these dreams in my heart anymore
I cannot let go of that which I most treasure
This pain that I believe gives me strength
This sorrow that I believe makes me resilient
This endless struggle I believe will never end
To all that I hold desire
To all that I hold truth
To all that I wish for freedom
To all that I wish for everything and nothing to be foreseen
Hide from me that which I must not see
For I believe that it will let me create a future I cannot regret